The To Do List

 One of the things that I have realised as an unqualified adult is that the to-do list never ends. 

I am not kidding. I work non stop and I am privileged enough to have help at home, who can look after cleaning and cooking while I go to work. But somehow, at the end of the day, I am always counting the tasks that need to be done, that should have been done a while back.

And this is after I complete everything on my plate for the day.

I wake up at 6:30 almost every morning. And I am doing things non stop. I am particular about food, so I help my cooking didi, I pack my lunch, I want to do morning yoga but I mostly fail, I try to spend ten minutes with my dogs before I leave for work. I shower, I barely spend anytime on skincare. And I am out of the house by 9 because well my office is far. 

Office is a hectic space these days, so no respite. I find myself taking a cab often just so that I can catch up on my reading or pending office work. Since I try to not open my laptop for work at home, there is usually some fire to put out that has emerged overnight. Which I think should not happen in an ideal world because everyone should be resting after work hours. But alas, it is what it is. 

I book groceries, do online banking work, manage meals, call my mom on the drive to work when I am not taking a cab. I get enough traffic to pull this off on most days. Else I spend the 15 mins extra I have before work day begins to do the same.

By the time I am done with work, I know I have to reach home and make some part of the meal because again, I am particular about what I eat. And while cooking didi is good, if I don't like something at the end of the day I know I will end up ordering in which I really don't want to. You get the picture. 

When I get home, I cook, eat, grumble about how I have not organised the kitchen better or how I need help who understands my language (there is a whole blog for that coming up... in short she is Bengali and she lied to me about understanding Hindi when I hired her, and I hate firing people).

And I also have the constant tussle between wanting to be a good adult and wanting to follow my dreams. This blog is a result of this dream part of my brain. I love making content and posting on social media. But I can't be regular because of all of the work I need to do in a day. 

I am also trying to become fitter (aka lose some weight), and that entails major meal prep and workout. I do the meals but I am never able to workout enough. I genuinely try to go for a walk in the evening but by the time I am done, it is already 11 and not sleeping on time will ruin the entire next day. 

Every morning I wake up contemplating a workout or some extra hours of sleep. 

It is a list with no end.

I don't even know how to train my help, how to get basics fixed, how to invest, how to re apply for my almost expired driving license. 

The worst part? After all of this, I still am struggling with money by mid month!

Gosh, I need a month long weekend to catch up!

No one will pay me for that.